Three in the Attic (1968)

What was I thinking? I just wrote in a review of Wild in the Streets that I had no need to see Christopher Jones again and then I turn around and watch his other 1968 film for American International Pictures.

The plot is that a college student tries to balance sexual relationships with three different women. When they find out, they lock him in an attic and try to give him so much sex so that finally he will ... uh ... and that's a big problem, as we never really know what the goal of all this is.

So its a sex comedy, only there's no sex, just before and after moments, so its all just a big tease. It certainly isn't sexy. Technically it is a comedy in that it is not a tragedy as no one dies. But I laughed a grand total of zero times.

There is a credited director, Richard Wilson, who did not have another official credit for 25 years after this movie. The acting is amateur hour. The only person who makes any impact is the female lead, Yvette Mimeux. The 60s style effects and camera tricks have no rhyme or reason and only serve to show that the director did not know what he was doing. I'd say this was the worst movie I have seen via Turner Classic Movies, but The Swarm was shown on that network last year.

Instead, I just wander through what doesn't work. There's the basic problem of your male lead supposedly being irresistible -- he's said to have bedded 50 women in a year and a half of college -- yet Jones has all the charisma of a clothes dryer. I start to wonder how the logistics of all this would work. In an attic with no  toilet, no shower, no ventilation, at the end of summer, with near constant sex -- what exactly does this place smell like after a couple of weeks?

It smells like the movie -- it stinks.

Grade: F